Comments on: Sometimes it’s not really about when you disclose your chronic illness. http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/sometimes-its-not-really-about-when-you-disclose-your-chronic-illness/ Fri, 03 Feb 2012 12:24:40 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Rosalind http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/sometimes-its-not-really-about-when-you-disclose-your-chronic-illness/comment-page-1/#comment-2557 Rosalind Wed, 14 May 2008 21:08:02 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=328#comment-2557 Funny, how it's hard to "go back" when you need/want help. It's common to grieve - and to struggle admitting what we "need" - how sick we might be or whatever the issue is if it's not something that we'd choose for ourselves. No, you haven't identified where you work -- and that's one of the things that makes these issues so tricky. We have to stay under the radar for fear of being found out. And because of that, employers don't have to face their own mistakes. I think that's a good topic for a post... Rosalind Funny, how it’s hard to “go back” when you need/want help. It’s common to grieve – and to struggle admitting what we “need” – how sick we might be or whatever the issue is if it’s not something that we’d choose for ourselves. No, you haven’t identified where you work — and that’s one of the things that makes these issues so tricky. We have to stay under the radar for fear of being found out. And because of that, employers don’t have to face their own mistakes. I think that’s a good topic for a post…
Rosalind

]]> By: Mary http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/sometimes-its-not-really-about-when-you-disclose-your-chronic-illness/comment-page-1/#comment-2556 Mary Wed, 14 May 2008 20:55:46 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=328#comment-2556 I am back in therapy/counseling because of the work upheaval. Actually I should have gone back before. But it wasn't until I got stuck in my grief process that i went for help. I had a session this morning and my therapist said essentially the same thing-minus the part about buying your book. :-0 LOL!! There is a general feeling of gloom in our dept because of the changes we have gone through. And everyone is a bit uptight about not having an honor system for comp time presently. But the issue for me is admitting that I am "that sick". I think I am a little surprised that I still have some denial going on in this area. I have a t-shirt that I sometimes wear that says "I have Fibromyalgia-but it does not have me." Asking for work accomodation says to me that is one win for the "beast" that I try to keep under control. I work hard at being as well as I can, which occupies a great deal of energy. Boy! I am glad that my e-mail address does not show here! And i don't think I have identified where I work. Mary I am back in therapy/counseling because of the work upheaval. Actually I should have gone back before. But it wasn’t until I got stuck in my grief process that i went for help. I had a session this morning and my therapist said essentially the same thing-minus the part about buying your book. :-0 LOL!!

There is a general feeling of gloom in our dept because of the changes we have gone through. And everyone is a bit uptight about not having an honor system for comp time presently. But the issue for me is admitting that I am “that sick”. I think I am a little surprised that I still have some denial going on in this area.

I have a t-shirt that I sometimes wear that says “I have Fibromyalgia-but it does not have me.” Asking for work accomodation says to me that is one win for the “beast” that I try to keep under control. I work hard at being as well as I can, which occupies a great deal of energy.

Boy! I am glad that my e-mail address does not show here! And i don’t think I have identified where I work.

Mary

]]> By: Rosalind http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/sometimes-its-not-really-about-when-you-disclose-your-chronic-illness/comment-page-1/#comment-2544 Rosalind Tue, 13 May 2008 16:47:59 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=328#comment-2544 Hi Mary, You've already figure out two key steps - how the symptoms affect your performance and what you need to do the job well. I You were lucky that you had that flex but I'm not surprised a new superisor doesn't "get it". Terms like comp time, leave, accommodations -- make these issues more difficult. It sounds as if this supervisor is pushing you into a position that makes you uncomfortable. And you're going to have to make some choices that might not be optimal to you. You might start with my Guidebook -'Are you Talking?" - it would help you identify some ways to talk about this (if you do). Rosalind Hi Mary,
You’ve already figure out two key steps – how the symptoms affect your performance and what you need to do the job well. I You were lucky that you had that flex but I’m not surprised a new superisor doesn’t “get it”. Terms like comp time, leave, accommodations — make these issues more difficult. It sounds as if this supervisor is pushing you into a position that makes you uncomfortable. And you’re going to have to make some choices that might not be optimal to you. You might start with my Guidebook -’Are you Talking?” – it would help you identify some ways to talk about this (if you do). Rosalind

]]> By: Mary http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/sometimes-its-not-really-about-when-you-disclose-your-chronic-illness/comment-page-1/#comment-2542 Mary Tue, 13 May 2008 16:33:01 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=328#comment-2542 Yes-my illness affects my performance. Sometimes I work slower. Sometimes I have to come in late because my motor is not working. I have always had the ability to flex my schedule or do work at home. Now I have a new supervisor-who does not "get it". He says that I am not entitled to comp time if I have used leave that week. I tell him, that the reason I have touse leave is because he is not allowing me to make up time by staying later. We went round about on this for awhile. he concluded by asking if I had ever considered applying formally for job accomodation. I don't really like the idea of doing that. I feel that puts my illness on the table and would mean I have to disclose more than I really want to. Mary Yes-my illness affects my performance. Sometimes I work slower. Sometimes I have to come in late because my motor is not working. I have always had the ability to flex my schedule or do work at home. Now I have a new supervisor-who does not “get it”. He says that I am not entitled to comp time if I have used leave that week. I tell him, that the reason I have touse leave is because he is not allowing me to make up time by staying later. We went round about on this for awhile. he concluded by asking if I had ever considered applying formally for job accomodation.

I don’t really like the idea of doing that. I feel that puts my illness on the table and would mean I have to disclose more than I really want to.

Mary

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