Comments on: Fighting illness is the wrong approach http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/fighting-illness-is-the-wrong-approach/ Thu, 02 Sep 2010 22:01:20 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Priscilla http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/fighting-illness-is-the-wrong-approach/comment-page-1/#comment-9839 Priscilla Wed, 31 Dec 2008 23:07:11 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=349#comment-9839 I agree. I'm so tired of the fighting thing. That idea did me a lot of harm. Stephen Levine says some interesting things on a closely related note. I think it was in Who Dies? that he wrote about a man who taught people to "fight" cancer mentally. He had some dramatic successes and these people became horrible to be with. The truth is none of us escapes. So what are we going to do with the choice we have? I say, be vulnerable, love, give as you are able, open your hands and receive this hard beautiful life. I agree. I’m so tired of the fighting thing. That idea did me a lot of harm. Stephen Levine says some interesting things on a closely related note. I think it was in Who Dies? that he wrote about a man who taught people to “fight” cancer mentally. He had some dramatic successes and these people became horrible to be with. The truth is none of us escapes. So what are we going to do with the choice we have? I say, be vulnerable, love, give as you are able, open your hands and receive this hard beautiful life.

]]> By: Rosalind http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/fighting-illness-is-the-wrong-approach/comment-page-1/#comment-2827 Rosalind Thu, 12 Jun 2008 14:49:42 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=349#comment-2827 You know, that's the funny thing about these posts. Different messages strike people differently. I'm with you in the pursuit of balance. What do you do, Heidi, that works for you? Rosalind You know, that’s the funny thing about these posts. Different messages strike people differently. I’m with you in the pursuit of balance. What do you do, Heidi, that works for you? Rosalind

]]> By: Heidi http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/fighting-illness-is-the-wrong-approach/comment-page-1/#comment-2819 Heidi Thu, 12 Jun 2008 02:51:34 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=349#comment-2819 Rosalind, this really struck a note with me. I oppose our cultural militaristic approach to life (Hummers, kid's cammo, and war-like phrasing "weekend warriors" etc). A militaristic approach accomplishes little, even in the history of actual battles. So mounting a battle is extremely incongruous for health and illness alike. We all are 'defeated' eventually; eternal life is not the opposite of 'losing the battle'. Many people face illness with a 'win at all costs' approach. They sacrifice their quality of life for a treatment ('battle plan") that is worse than the disease. We need to focus on the process and the quality of our life; not focus on a tense, oppositional, defiance to the experience of illness. So many who have lived with illness talk about the incredible gifts it brings to their lives, that 'healthy' people miss: the sharpening of our senses, the moderation of our pace and our excesses, the apppreciation of life, and the pursuit of balance. Your advice for the Senator is right on. Thank you for your words and wisdom. Heidi Rosalind, this really struck a note with me.

I oppose our cultural militaristic approach to life (Hummers, kid’s cammo, and war-like phrasing “weekend warriors” etc). A militaristic approach accomplishes little, even in the history of actual battles. So mounting a battle is extremely incongruous for health and illness alike. We all are ‘defeated’ eventually; eternal life is not the opposite of ‘losing the battle’. Many people face illness with a ‘win at all costs’ approach. They sacrifice their quality of life for a treatment (‘battle plan”) that is worse than the disease.

We need to focus on the process and the quality of our life; not focus on a tense, oppositional, defiance to the experience of illness. So many who have lived with illness talk about the incredible gifts it brings to their lives, that ‘healthy’ people miss: the sharpening of our senses, the moderation of our pace and our excesses, the apppreciation of life, and the pursuit of balance.

Your advice for the Senator is right on. Thank you for your words and wisdom.
Heidi

]]> By: Mary http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/fighting-illness-is-the-wrong-approach/comment-page-1/#comment-2690 Mary Tue, 27 May 2008 19:51:52 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=349#comment-2690 I have been wrapped up this weekend in reading Randy Pausch's book, "The Last Lecture" & then going on line and listening to his original lecture that spawned the book. And crying and crying in the process! His stuff really moved me (obviously) and I think speaks to this point of what to do with terminal illness. He writes and speaks about LIVING; overcoming obstacles (he calls them bricks walls in his talk)& helping others to obtain their dreams. He is big on time management and seizing every moment. He says that time is all we have and you may find one day that you have less than you think. So while we have to acknowledge limitations imposed by our illness, I think we fight for control and ownership rather than the disease controlling us. Mary I have been wrapped up this weekend in reading Randy Pausch’s book, “The Last Lecture” & then going on line and listening to his original lecture that spawned the book. And crying and crying in the process! His stuff really moved me (obviously) and I think speaks to this point of what to do with terminal illness. He writes and speaks about LIVING; overcoming obstacles (he calls them bricks walls in his talk)& helping others to obtain their dreams. He is big on time management and seizing every moment. He says that time is all we have and you may find one day that you have less than you think.

So while we have to acknowledge limitations imposed by our illness, I think we fight for control and ownership rather than the disease controlling us.

Mary

]]> By: Rosalind http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/fighting-illness-is-the-wrong-approach/comment-page-1/#comment-2689 Rosalind Tue, 27 May 2008 13:03:54 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=349#comment-2689 Thanks, Mark. So what verb should we use? Thanks, Mark. So what verb should we use?

]]> By: Mark http://workingwithchronicillness.com/2008/05/fighting-illness-is-the-wrong-approach/comment-page-1/#comment-2688 Mark Tue, 27 May 2008 12:48:11 +0000 http://workingwithchronicillness.com/?p=349#comment-2688 I totally agree, thank you for posting this! I totally agree, thank you for posting this!

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